A lovely woman I work with just emailed me this Mother's Day piece...
The Wide Spectrum of Mothering
by Amy Young
To those who gave birth this year - we celebrate with you
To those who lost a child this year - we mourn with you
To those who are in the trenches with little ones every day and wear the badge of food stains - we appreciate you
To those who experienced loss this year through miscarriage, failed adoptions, or running away - we mourn with you
To those who walk the hard path of infertility, fraught with pokes, prods, tears, and disappointment - we walk with you. Forgive us when we say foolish things. We don't mean to make this harder than it is.
To those who are foster moms, mentor moms, and spiritual moms - we need you
To those who have warm and close relationships with your children - we celebrate with you
To those who have disappointment, heart ache, and distance with your children - we sit with you
To those who lost their own mothers - we grieve with you
To those who experienced abuse at the hands of your mother - we acknowledge your experience
To those who have lived through driving tests, medical tests, and the overall testing of motherhood - we are better for having you in our midst
To those who have aborted children - we remember them and you on this day
To those who are single and long to be mothering your own children -we mourn that life has not turned out the way you longed for it to be
To those who are step-mothers - we walk with you on these complex paths
To those who envisioned lavishing love on grandchildren, yet that dream is not to be - we grieve with you
To those who will have emptier nests in the upcoming year - we grieve and rejoice with you
And to those who are pregnant with new life, both expected and surprising - we anticipate with you
This Mother's Day, we walk with you. Mothering is not for the faint of heart and we have real warriors in our midst. We remember you.
I'd add at least one more...
For those who brought children into this world and then had the strength to allow others to parent them - we honor your courage and choice
Even just reading this list through brings complex feelings up in ME as I imagine my readers reading these statements. I know some of them will feel hard or raw or rough. Still I think it is a good reminder that there are lots of complex and differing experiences (each and every moment of life, including Mother's Day). It is a lovely thing to be able to feel the place YOU are has been acknowledged and honored. It is an equally lovely thing to be able to step outside your own experience and acknowledge and honor the experiences of others and the humanity that unites us all.
Can you get there right now? If not, it's okay. If so, take some time there.
And when in doubt... breathe.
Welcome to my blog!
I'm an acupuncturist, teacher, fertility specialist, patient centered advocate, mom, activist and more! This blog is a place for me to write down the things on my mind, the things I discuss over and over, and the things I find helpful, interesting, and inspiring all in the hope that someone else out there, maybe YOU, will find some of these things to be helpful, interesting and inspiring too. I love learning, I love sharing, and I am passionate about helping others lead more balanced, fertile, and healthy lives - while trying to do the same myself. So here goes... The Blogging Life...